Chapter 8

After leaving for five days, we arrived at the edge of the Northern Army's influence. Beyond another city, we would be considered within the control of the court. Qingshanzi disguised me as an old woman, and he transformed into my son, playing the role of a son escorting his mother back to her hometown. Although I had significant objections to the identity of an old mother, I thought about my own age of several hundred years, and being called 'mother' should not be a big deal, so I reluctantly agreed.

I hesitate to call him, unable to believe that time can truly torment a person into such a state

The journey back to Beijing was much faster than the trip there

Old Song's lips trembled slightly, and after a long silence, he struggled to sit up and said sternly: "Who brought you back! Even if I am down on my luck, I would never resort to selling my daughter to survive!"

I lay on the shoulder of the black warrior, watching the chaotic scene at the city gate. For some reason, I suddenly recalled the day of my reincarnation, the clamor of chickens and dogs at the Bridge of Helplessness. Yet today, there are no resentful eyes of youth staring at me intently. I suddenly felt a pang of emptiness in my heart, as if I craved some form of suffering.

The remnants of the General's Mansion opposite the Minister's Residence have been thoroughly cleared away, and in the context of the history of the Celestial Empire, the once-great General's Mansion has become nothing more than a negligible entry in the annals of history

The green-clad soldier rode swiftly to the city gate, reined in his horse, and took out a portrait from his bosom, casually affixing it to the notice board: "Anyone whose appearance bears a resemblance of three parts to the person in the portrait, regardless of gender or age, must be brought back to the government office!"

Once again, I let out a long sigh. Just as I was feeling lost, I suddenly saw a shadow flickering in front of my door. I raised an eyebrow, wondering if it was Qing Shanzi and the others who had come recklessly searching for me. However, upon hearing the faint murmurs coming from the doorway, I couldn't help but feel a tightening in my chest.

I am pondering a profound question: "How similar is three parts to being similar?"

Along the way, a tense atmosphere of vigilance permeated every corner of the land, with anxiety evident on the faces of the common people. Unbeknownst to me, the situation had become so tense. In the northern frontier, I had isolated myself too well, and the land, sea, and air had protected me too closely

The horse reared its hooves, and amidst its mournful neighing, Hei Wu shouted, "Run!" The two of them executed their lightness skills, stepping on the shoulders of those in front and soaring far away.

Lu Haikong paused for a moment, his body softened, and after hesitating for a while, he placed his hand on my back, holding me loosely, as if afraid that holding too tightly would offend me. I heard him sigh in my ear: "Yunxiang, at that time I was not acquiescing; I was only thinking about how to refuse my uncle, how to bring up... bring up... bring up the matter of marrying you."

As long as land, sea, and air provoke me just once, even if it is only once, won't I be able to resolutely eliminate him? Why! ... Why ... ... Making that kind of expression, almost making me feel guilty.

It is land, sea, and air; after such grievances, he came running to find me again, truly... It is an indescribable discomfort.

How could I possibly fathom his convoluted thoughts? I took a deep breath, just as I was about to apologize to him, he suddenly grasped the sleeve of my garment and softly said: "Yunxiang, I am not an ingrate. I know my right eye is not pleasing to the eye, but... please do not disdain it, nor me."

I rubbed my forehead. To be honest, I have not personally experienced the grievances I have faced since coming to the northern region. Firstly, I spend my days in the Lanxiang Tavern, where I hear little idle talk. Secondly, as the daughter of a minister, I have managed to live safely in the 'rebel capital' for five years, which I believe is largely due to Lu Haikong's assistance. He must have endured far more grievances than I have. Logically and emotionally, I should prioritize responding to Lu Haikong at this moment. However, this afternoon, Qingshanzi brought me a piece of news that has made me reconsider. Although I have lived a life devoid of much personal connection, I still feel the need to uphold filial piety.

Perhaps it is the chill of this night that has bewitched me, compelling me to step across the threshold and embrace Lu Haikong. I wrap my arms around his back, holding him tightly.

He has been lingering at the door, neither knocking nor coming in. Instead, I grew anxious waiting and walked to the door, where I could hear him mumbling to himself outside: "Yunxiang, I am sorry. I am not acquiescing; I am just thinking about how to refuse my uncle, how to bring it up... bring it up... Yunxiang, I am sorry. I am not acquiescing..."

Old Song's eyes widened, and he suddenly let out a bitter laugh: "Those two were executed by the current emperor as early as the year before last. The ones sent to fetch you are probably just the imperial guards in disguise..." Old Song shook his head, "Back then, we went to great lengths to send you and Haikong to the northern frontier... Yet now, you have still been drawn into this, Yunxiang. I am sorry for you, sorry for your mother, sorry for Brother Lu and Haikong, and even more sorry for the late emperor"

My eyes widened in astonishment

If I can make even a small difference by going back, then I should return

At fifteen, Lu Haikong has already grown taller than me. It is the first time I have observed the expression in his eyes so seriously. The moonlight reflects off the snow in the courtyard, casting a brilliant glow in his dark pupils. This child truly exists, not merely as a fleeting fragment in the initial moments of life, but as a person living authentically.

In the end, I decided to go to the South City Gate alone, following Qingshanzi and the others back to the capital. Because I know that even without Lu, Hai, and Kong, I can still live well. In the capital, there is the elderly Song father, my long-lost maid Cui Bi, and many others. They should not perish in the so-called political struggles, like the General's residence five years ago, reduced to ashes with no remains left.

I tossed and turned on the bed, rolling back and forth, unable to shake off the pale expression of Lu Haikong from my mind. I sat up, covering my face with my hands and sighed. How could that guy Chukong have such a fate? He is clearly an arrogant and conceited man! ... How could it have turned out like this ...

During this period, I am unaware of the extent of the open and covert struggles between Father Song and the current emperor, but looking at Father Song's current appearance, I know that this man, who is only in his forties, has already exhausted his vitality

After hearing these words, I found myself hesitating. If I were caught here and sent back, what would happen to Lu Haikong and me

I thought for half a day and finally came up with an excuse: "Luhai Kong, you say you treat me well, and you don't want to let me down, but do you love me?" After asking this, I shivered myself. I suppressed the nauseating emotions and continued to ask: "You respect me and honor me, but what I want is not these; this is not the love between a man and a woman, nor the affection between husband and wife. You... still think about it some more."

Watching his figure disappear into the courtyard, I stood at the door, covering my face fiercely. How can that brat smile so charmingly! And you shouldn't respond to this issue with such a mature adult expression! You make me feel like a sulking child, which is quite embarrassing for me!

I couldn't be bothered with him, so I kept my head down and walked forward. Just as I was about to step out of the city gate, suddenly, a soldier in a blue collar abruptly blocked my way and said, "Elder, please raise your head a little."

For the first time, I find that sleeping is actually so difficult

He did not press me to explain anything further, only smiling as he said: "If Yunxiang is willing, just let me know, and if you wish to take your time, we shall take our time. The snowy night is cold, so Yunxiang, please take care to keep warm. I will head back first."

I cannot imagine what his expression would be like if I were to tell him, "I want to return to the capital to help my father, and I want to marry the Third Prince." I pushed aside Lu Haikong and scratched my head: "Don't rush, let me think for a moment."

A few years ago, it was impossible, but now the opportunity has arisen. Yunxiang cannot be delayed any longer. Just before the army marches south, there is still some free time. Therefore, I thought of arranging the wedding... I have just convinced my uncle. Yunxiang, do you agree?

I was originally a cloud, born and nurtured by nature, without father or mother, and I do not understand what it feels like to have parental love as deep as a mountain. However, at this moment, I feel that this old man, even if he is a notorious villain in the outside world, deserves to be treated well by me, for in my eyes, he is merely a lonely father.

Upon careful reflection, I suddenly realized that everything following the night of the fire at the General's residence was shrouded in mystery. After those two men in black left, there was no further news from the residence, and the court did not immediately send anyone to pursue such an important item as the General's order. My companions and I traveled at a pace that could almost be described as a crawl, yet not a single pursuer caught up with us. The military leader of the northern border, Lu Lan, openly declared rebellion, and astonishingly, the court took five years to finally take action to address the situation

I clearly understand that Song Yunxiang's life is but a fleeting illusion, and he lived it with ease; however, for Lu Haikong, this is his life, his only life

My emotions are somewhat complicated, and as I bend my waist, I truly appear somewhat aged

I was taken aback, somewhat confused: "Wasn't it you who asked Qingshanzi and Heiwujian to bring me back?"

The suddenly opened door startled Lu Haikong quite a bit. He stared at me blankly for a while, his face gradually turning red, only to pale again shortly after.

Father, I said, "I am an unfilial daughter. I am willing to marry the Third Prince."

The black-clad warrior and Qingshanzi behind her immediately tensed up, and Qingshanzi whispered, "Miss, keep your head down"

The young women have all been detained, and the soldiers are checking them one by one to release them. Qingshanzi is supporting me on my right, while Heiwu walks a step behind. As we pass by the soldiers, Qingshanzi pretends to whisper beside me: "Mother, it's just the officials and soldiers checking people, it's nothing to worry about"

I heard a mysterious sigh from the two people behind me, and I did not understand what they were sighing about. I raised my head and took a distant glance at the image on the notice, and in an instant, I was stunned. Which artist could capture my likeness so accurately?

I patted the back of his withered hand: "Father, it's fine, I am not that fragile."

Upon returning to the territory of the court, Qing Shanzi and Hei Wu acted with much greater generosity, purchasing horses and traveling along the official roads, significantly increasing their speed. Before long, they returned to the capital.

For a moment, I found myself at a loss as to what kind of expression to wear while looking at him

The land, sea, and air tugged at my sleeves without letting go: "I know that Yunxiang accompanied me to the northern frontier and left behind many things. You have also endured a lot of grievances since coming here. However, no matter what, you have always been by my side. I know that Yunxiang treats me well, and I do not want to let you down..."

Before I could even process the thoughts in my mind, Hei Wu suddenly grabbed my hand from behind. I looked at him in confusion, and Hei Wu said, "Excuse me" before he forcefully lifted me onto his shoulder with his strong arms. At that moment, Qing Shanzi also drew a soft sword from his waist and without saying a word, he thrust it directly towards the eyes of the mount of the green-clad military officer.

A guard, his legs giving way, hurriedly ran inside. The first person he wanted to see upon returning to the residence was naturally my father. However, contrary to my expectations, I did not see the furious Song father in the hall, but instead found a frail old man, emaciated and bedridden, in his bedroom.

In the northern region, apart from land, sea, and air, who else would observe me so meticulously

Lu Haikong's body suddenly stiffened, and then became increasingly rigid: "Yun yun yun yun yun ... ... Xiang?"

To spare no effort in sending me and Lu Haikong to the northern frontier

He lingered outside for so long, having prepared so much, yet when he saw me, the first words that escaped his lips were this one sentence. It is evident that the injury in his eyes, though unspoken, has become his Achilles' heel. I also understand the extent of the blow my angry words dealt him, and I have come to realize that he was so afraid of me looking down on him.

I apologize. I said, "That was just a moment of thoughtless words, I am sorry. I did not mean to disdain you, please do not be upset."

No matter how complex the emotions or how many words there are, they are all shattered by his single statement

Lu Haikong was taken aback, as if he did not expect me to say such words. After a moment of thought, he said: "I do not understand those things, but in this lifetime, I will never marry anyone else. Yunxiang, the one who needs to think again is you."

After a long absence, upon entering the capital, Qingshanzi and Heiwu excused themselves, claiming they had matters to attend to, and left me to return to the Prime Minister's residence on my own. I found it strange; weren't they afraid I would run away? But then I thought, having arrived in the capital, there was nowhere for me to escape to, so I obediently returned to the Prime Minister's residence by myself

The guards at the residence still remain the same as before. Upon seeing me, they were all greatly startled: "Little... Sister has returned?"

His words went back and forth several times, all circling back to this sentence. I felt anxious to the point of frustration, and I abruptly opened the door, saying to Lu Haikong: "What exactly do you want to say to your uncle!"

I nodded: "I am back."

Three days later, I left a letter on the table in my room: I am going hunting in the mountains, and my return date is uncertain. You decide whether to go to war by land, sea, or air; do not wait for my return to get married.

As I passed the last city gate, the officials and soldiers were conducting a routine inspection. Suddenly, a young officer in a green uniform rode in on a tall horse from the other end of the street, the sound of his horse's hooves clattering mixed with his loud shouts: "Urgent order! Detain all young women! No one is allowed to leave the city!" He repeated this over and over, and the soldiers guarding the city immediately blocked the way of all the citizens with their red-tasseled spears, stating: "No young women are allowed to leave the city!"

Old Song lay on the bed, looking at me somewhat dazedly. He closed his eyes and rested for a long time, then sighed again, with moisture beginning to well up in the corners of his eyes: "They have left... they have left, and should not return."